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Submitted on
May 27, 2008
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I ain't backing down
I can't, not when I'm so far gone
Yes my wounds are burning
But so is the fire within me
Yes my vision is blurring
But I keep my eyes on the prize
I can hear them all around me
The screams torturing my inner being
My animal is showing
So I won't care... I won't care.
I fight for my right
To live and not to die
Freedom is roaring
Like an overbearing thunder
"I will be free, I will be free"
I clench my teeth as I pull on through
Trying to dodge the bullets and bombs--
The crying.. the children crying.
Why can I not save all the children?
They litter the streets
- the dead bodies-
Stuck in the gutters like fallen leaves
The smell of rusty red stings my nose,
But I run into the oncoming fog...
Red paints the walls, the streets, the town;
My clothes, my face, my wounds, my heart
But all I can see, everywhere,
Is black, pitched in its darkest shade.
Well let it hide my aching bones!
Have them seek me out
I'll take 'em down one by one.
Sirens blare
Fire scorches
But it's not the light at the end of the tunnel.
Running, keep running...
My insides burn and ache
Salty liquid gleams on my forehead
And stings my pupils
But I ain't backing down... can't back down.
Silence reaks
Death stirs
The witching hour strikes
Letting my invisibility
Melt down to the core
Of my inner being.
My humanity
Grieving at the sight before me
Morbid serenity
Never fleeting my blank stare
Perturbed,
I smile grimly at the irony
of the battle finally won.
Understand that the way it is writting is how I read it outloud to myself. I'm already starting on my indie pieces for next year so it gives everyone more time to memorize poems this year. :D

Any type of criticism is greatly appreciated. I know a lot have said to me that there is none since it is my own work, but anything that strikes you as unusual or doesn't make sense... or you don't like it, I'd love to know because it helps with my selections later on.

domo arigato.
-Jenny
:iconarkthehero:
arkthehero Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2008
hmmmmsses
it's very good... lots of strong imagery so the readers almost feel like they're watching it.
in the end it strikes me with the feeling it can be interpreted an endless number of ways. It's liek one of the poems the English teacher spends the whole class period trying to get the class to interpret but they never say what he/she is looking for. I always wonder what makes the teacher's answer the only right one, as if the teacher had gotten his/her interpretation straight from the author's mouth.
I'm sorry, I just started a rant in your comment box oh welly welly well x_x
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:iconblak-image713:
Blak-image713 Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2008
It could be interpreted in many ways, yes...
I wasn't even in my own mindset when I wrote it. I thought out all the keywords in my head, tried to think like a soldier or a man whose losing everything... like his sanity, the will to fight and live, he's cracking under all the horror of a world that is so alive in many places; it's not a slasher film at all.

Oh, and if you give this to your English professor, ask him what he thinks because then at least someone will know what it means; right? lol.
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